


When I heard that sound, when the walls came down, I was thinking about you

by JuliaBaggins



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It, M/M, Spoilers for The Golden Circle, there's a little cuddling and a lot of feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-26
Updated: 2017-09-26
Packaged: 2019-01-05 20:37:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12196986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JuliaBaggins/pseuds/JuliaBaggins
Summary: Be careful if you haven't seen The Golden Circle yet; there definitely are spoilers!My take on the plane scene between Harry & Eggsy, and some other things.“I’ve never had a relationship, and I’ve never been in love”, Harry continued, feeling as if he was twisting a knife into his own chest.Not until I met you.“Life’s only worth living when you have something to lose.”And this nearly is enough, enough for Eggsy to tell Harry that it had felt like he lost everything that day.





	When I heard that sound, when the walls came down, I was thinking about you

**Author's Note:**

> I just came back from the cinema and had to write a little something, because I loved the movie but at the same time felt like I would have prefered the ending a little differently...

They were on a plane somewhere over the sea, Eggsy and Harry, and when Eggsy looked at his mentor, he still couldn’t believe it. Harry was standing there in a suit as well-fitting as the one he wore the day they met, and he was making them drinks, just as he did that wonderful evening. The evening when Eggsy had stayed over at his house, when Harry had cooked for him and talked about forks and Eggsy had barely listened because the way Harry had brushed his hand when showing him how to hold a certain kind of spoon just minutes ago had been too distracting. The evening when Eggsy had went to bed in Harry’s guest room after Harry had padded him on the shoulder a little awkwardly when wishing a good night, and Eggsy had to swallow because suddenly it seemed like a perfectly good idea to hold that hand of Harry’s in his. The evening before he had been told to shot his dog, before Harry had looked at him so very disappointed because he had wasted his chance to become a Kingsman agent. The one right before Harry went off to America to die.

Harry handed Eggsy one of the glasses, and Eggsy couldn’t help but let his little finger touch Harry’s just for a split second when he handed him the drink. It had started right in the moment when he had seen Harry there, shaving and surrounded by butterflies and alive alive _alive_ – this impulse to hold him in his arms, to touch him, to just be sure that he was actually _there_ and that he wouldn’t leave again. When Harry had rejected his hug it had hurt, it had hurt oh so much, but when he shoved Eggsy away it had been better than nothing. Because he felt Harry’s touch through his suit, the strength behind his hands, and it was proof that Harry was actually there, and not some ghost or something. And it had been enough, for the moment – just knowing that through some miracle, Harry had actually survived the bullet Valentine had sent right through his head.

Soon after, Eggsy had become desperate again, because he missed _his_ Harry. The way that his eyes had always seemed to soften just the tiniest bit when he looked at Eggsy, and now, his eye had flashed over Eggsy without recognition. The dog had been his very last idea, and if this wouldn’t have worked, Eggsy had promised himself that he would let Harry go; allow him to get happy with his butterflies, no matter how much it might have broken Eggsy’s heart to lose Harry the second time. 

Harry came back to him though, and they finally got their hug that Eggsy had needed so much, a puppy somewhere in between them. And now, they were here, on a mission together like Eggsy had dreamed back in the days when he wasn’t a Kingsman quite yet, and he had just mentioned his girlfriend. Ignoring how weird just the thought of her, of their relationship, felt right now. Ignoring what might have been in Harry’s eye, or might have been just Eggsy’s imagination.

 

“Do you know what flashed through my mind right before Valentine shot me?“, Harry asked, and he hoped that Eggsy did not indeed know it. 

“Nothing”, he continued, and it hurt Harry’s heart how easy the lie fell off his lips. 

_I saw you; remembered that morning we had breakfast together after you staid over at my house. You laughed when I walked out of the bathroom in my favourite pyjamas, the ones with the little butterfly pattern. And there was something in your eyes right then, something nearly.. tender, and I wondered if maybe, maybe…_

“I’ve never had a relationship, and I’ve never been in love”, Harry continued, feeling as if he was twisting a knife into his own chest.

_Not until I met you._

“I knew that I had nothing I could come back to, and I felt lonely. And alone.”

When Eggsy heard that, he wanted to scream at Harry. Shout into his face that he very much had something to come back to, and that he wasn’t alone, not ever. That Eggsy would always be there, as well as Merlin. Eggsy wanted to ask Harry if he knew what went through _Eggsy’s_ head when Valentine shot Harry.

“Life’s only worth living when you have something to lose.”

This nearly is enough, enough for Eggsy to tell Harry that it had felt like he lost _everything_ that day.

But Eggsy said nothing, like he had never said anything _before_ , and soon, Harry is flashing him a little smile.

“Let’s go safe your girl.”

And if Eggsy might have noticed that Harry’s smile looked a little forced, that he couldn’t quite look Eggsy in the eyes when he said _your girl_ , then he’s sure that he was imagining things.

 

Things went quick after that; they got to Poppy’s headquarters, lost Merlin (something that none of them really had progressed back then, because allowing themselves to feel it would have broken them), fought against Whiskey and robot dogs and finally saved the world.

 

Eggsy still tried to wrap his mind around the fact that _Elton John_ had just walked past him, sunglasses and feather hat in place, when Harry sat down next to him. They were both silent for a moment, staring into the deep green forests ahead of them, when Harry cleared his throat and, after a little hesitation, rested his hand on Eggsy’s shoulder.

“Well done, Galahad”, Harry said with a smile, and when the answer he got was Eggsy’s wonderful laugh, he joined right in. 

“We really should do something about the names”, Eggsy said, and Harry nodded.

A moment later, Harry realized how his hand was still resting on Eggsy’s shoulder and how, furthermore, Eggsy didn’t seem to mind. Quite the opposite actually – to Harry, it seemed as if Eggs might have shifted a little closer, closer to Harry.

“Any suggestions?”, Harry asked, because thinking about code names was easier than thinking about how close Eggsy sat to him, and how fast his own heart was beating.

“Let’s think about that tomorrow, _Galahad_ ”, Eggsy answered with a smirk, and then, he carefully rested his head on Harry’s shoulder.

 

Harry froze for a second, and then, he wrapped his arm around Eggsy, holding him close while the younger man seemed to melt into his side.

“I missed you”, Eggsy whispered, and hadn’t they been so close, Harry would not have been able to hear him.

“I’m sorry”, was Harry’s answer, because he couldn’t think of anything else to say.

Eggsy’s next words were even quieter.

“Please don’t leave me again, Harry.”

“I won’t Eggsy, not if I have a word in it.”

Harry didn’t _promise_ anything, because they just did what they did, but he knew that Eggsy understood him anyways. And just in case that he needed another hint, Harry pressed a feather light kiss into Eggsy’s hair.

He could feel Eggsy’s smile against his shoulder, and for the first time since he came back, Harry truly felt at _home._ And tomorrow, they would not only talk about their codenames, but also about how Harry felt like Eggsy might _belong_ where he was right now, here in Harry's arms...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Nice comments would make my day ❤
> 
> Title from the song "Skin" by the Rag ’n’ Bone Man.


End file.
